Chapter 3: The Tale of Sneaky Snake the Flattering Fool

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Sneaky Snake, of scheming nature, is quite the creature sly,

He was born without a soul and with darkness in his eye.

He had no sense of feeling, and his heart was truly cold,

Though he was quite the fool, his goal was power, fierce and bold.

He had no skills or merit, other than for scheming,

Yet to be a campus ruler, Sneaky Snake was always dreaming.

For as a campus ruler, he could act without a care,

To wreak havoc left and right and make the faculty despair.

At first, however, he did fail to join the campus leader lot,

Back when wise administrators could clearly see his plot.

So he attempted other jobs to make the people cower,

But his skills were clearly lacking, and he never got to power.

With wicked plans beyond compare, he kept along his path,

He slowly worked on tactics, and then he checked the math;

Until one day he was convinced that he’d hit on a winner,

His laughter echoed through the night, for he was such a sinner.

His dreams of power were relentless, and he went to action,

He worked with fury, without rest, to join the campus faction.

With every plot and scheming tactic, Sneaky Snake was one step nearer,

To managing a campus – his path was getting clearer.

One day he made his application, to be on the administration,

A lack of skills did not deter him, for his fawning was well-done.

He flattered every person, showing grandeur over-rated,

His words were sweet as honey, his intentions obfuscated.

Oozing charm, he flattered Nokloo and others at the college,

He said to them, quite cleverly, you really must acknowledge:

"Dear friends, how I admire your wisdom and your zeal!

I long to serve beside you, my loyalty is real!"

Sneaky Snake’s campaign continued, as he worked his way around,

Convincing everyone who mattered, that he was the best they’d found.

With each new conversation, he spun his web of lies,

Until at last, the feckless leaders granted him the prize.

And so, the fool was granted, an administrator seat,

A place of power and prestige, but his plan was not complete.

He grinned with satisfaction, but really he wasn’t through,

To be supreme Campus Ruler, was his true aim to pursue.

And there he was, so new to power, he pretended to be nice,

He was helpful to the faculty, even though his heart was ice.

They all were lulled into a slumber, thinking they were truly blessed,

They thought that he was on their side, they really were impressed.

But it was not so very long at all before the evil plot,

Of the Sneaky Snake turned quickly ‘round from cold to blazing hot;

For the current acting-Campus Ruler, he was only temporary,

Sneaky Snake did plan to put that job upon his stationery.

It really was quite strange, however, many did opine,

That Sneaky Snake had only been there for a little time.

Yet many on the faculty had quite the funny notion,

That they had been there very long without receiving a promotion!

Indeed, the tenure of the snake, in his new campus mission,

Was just a few short months, which raised a big suspicion!

The faculty said, with voice upraised, “This really is unfair!”

But there was a big conspiracy that Big Boss did prepare.

Small Campus has an ostrich and some gophers, too,

But they’d never had a snake before, as far as Big Boss knew.

So throwing caution to the wind, ignoring warning signs,

They promoted Sneaky Snake right up, crossing all the lines.

The serpentine dictator started out his reign,

By making sure the faculty were tied down with a chain.

And at their desks they had to stay, all night and all day,

And they also had to grovel when e’er he passed their way.

When at last the faculty did try to stand up for their rights,

The Sneaky Snake turned right around, and got them in his sights.

He looked at them quite plainly, in his eye there was a glint,

He sneered at them, “I don’t care! It’s a job requirement!”

Later faculty, distraught, said to Nokloo, “What the hell?”

But Nokloo simply danced around and rang a little bell.

He pranced along the college halls, then sat upon a stool,

By now the faculty should know that Nokloo is a fool!

So Sneaky Snake was left unfettered, to rule the campus wide,

And faculty, they could do nothing, no matter how they tried.

For Big Boss and his lawyers, and the gophers of HR,

Backed Sneaky Snake up to the hilt, as if he were the Tsar.

But Big Boss and the university, little did they know,

That Sneaky Snake’s ambitions did not cease to grow.

For Sneaky Snake’s true plan, his goal he would complete,

Was to take the place of Nokloo, no doubt by much deceit!

But then one day, the Sneaky Snake was made into a clown,

When the Brave Little Lecturer stood and told him to back down.

For the Brave Little Lecturer was a true and noble knight,

You can see that by his armor, so shiny and so bright.

The Brave Little Lecturer told Sneaky Snake, quite clear,

That he would stand against his terror, ever without fear.

Then Sneaky Snake became afraid, but he was still ambitious;

So like a coward, he did hide, his attacks were surreptitious.

Yet this new tact did not deter the lecturer at all,

For he knew that one day soon, the Sneaky Snake would fall.

For evil often gains a foothold, succeeding at the first,

But in the end, it’s doomed to fail, the evil plans reversed.

OUR STORY ALL ABOUT THE PLIGHT, 
OF THE FACULTY IS QUITE A FRIGHT!
BUT NEXT WE HAVE SOME LAZY LOAFERS,
IT'S THE ODD LITTLE TALE OF THE CAMPUS GOPHERS!